1966 Born in farm town in New Jersey.
1978 Tries pottery at summer camp while wearing a Rush concert tee.
1979 Begs parents to buy him a wheel and kiln.
1980-84 Spends entire adolescence in basement of family’s modern house throwing pots.
1984-88 Allegedly studies semiotics and art history at Brown but actually spends all his time at RISD making pots.
1989 Makes quilted line of pottery inspired by Chanel. Evil professor advises him to bag pottery and try a career in law.
1990 Moves to New York and starts working at a talent agency.
1993 Deeply depressed from three long years in the movie business (as anyone would be),quits and returns to the studio to recuperate. Tells parents he wants to be a potter and vowsnever to have a real job again. Concerned parents schedule an intervention.
1994 Shows pots to Barney’s and gets an order. Realizes he has to make the pots.
1995 Orders pour in. Time to make the donuts.
1996 Time to make the donuts.
1997 At wit’s end from making the donuts, hooks up with Aid to Artisans, a non-profit organization which helps artisans in developing countries to make products for the American market. Flies to Peru and discovers paradise - a beautiful workshop by the sea with parrots and gardens and incredible artisans, creative explosion ensues.
1998 Opens a store in Soho.
1999 Adopts (with his partner Simon Doonan) a Norwich terrier named Liberace who is the light of their lives.
2000 Millennium madness! Luckily Y2K has no impact on pottery wheels.
2001 Bicoastal! Opens store in Los Angeles. Fervently hopes the cast of Friends will stop by. They don’t.
2002 Launches a glamorous new furniture collection and takes on interior design projects.Starts fondling swatches as well as clay. Liberace turns three
2003 Develops raging obsession with waspy country club style - needlepoint, chinoiserie and acid green lacquer. Concerned Jewish mother schedules another intervention
2004 Kooky creative odyssey continues. Branches out into new categories - bedding, towels, stationery and designs The Parker Palm Springs hotel. Finds it increasingly difficult to make time to watch Law and Order.
2005 Opens stores in Miami, Chicago, Madison Avenue and San Francisco (oodles of frequent flyer miles). Wildly expands furniture line with even more glamorous upholstered groups and casegoods. Writes first design book! Jewish mother proud, but Liberace remains aloof – he is, after all, a Terrier...
2006 Turns 40! Reluctantly relinquishes ingénue status. Suddenly needlepoint obsession becomes less ironic & more age appropriate.
2007 Reality TV! Joins the Bravo family as lead judge on Top Design. Wanders the streets in outfits borrowed from the TV show hoping to be recognized. Alas.....
2008 Gets hitched to Simon... hopes his civil right to marriage will be upheld.
2009 More stores, more stuff, more fun. Tapped to design a real life Malibu Dream House to celebrate Barbie’s 50th. Can finally make amends for decapitating sister’s Barbie in 1974.
2010 Proud Mary keeps on rolling. Despite gnarly economy, spreads Happy Chic message with 2 new books, a bunch of new stores, and a slew of life-enhancing designs. Liberace (12 years old!) barks at Lollipop Peacock.
2011 Selected to be Lacoste’s 6th Annual Holiday Collectors Series artist, opened first international store in London with aim of world-wide domination . . .